I'm Sorry
by TailBone11
Summary: The title says it all people, I'm Sorry is a little sad bit I've been working on for Reagan/Amy
1. Chapter 1

"Now I know we are all here to celebrate my beautiful Girls 23rd birthday but I thought I might make this birthday a little more remembered" Reagan called out for quiet over the crowd.

Reagan turned back to look at Amy with a wide smile as she got down on one knee and pulled the microphone up to her lips and a small black box in her other hand.

"Shrimps…you're one in a million, I've never really thought about marriage, never thought I would be the one getting down on one knee to the girl of my dreams either, but even after a couple of dates I knew this was it for me, you were the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, the one I can fight with over anything and still know you love me just how I am at the end of the day" Amy stood shocked in her spot as Reagan had a few tears on her cheeks. " I've been trying to pick a moment to spring this on you for the last 8 months and tonight just felt right, here with all or friends and family, Amy Raudenfeld I love you so much…will you marry me" Reagan put the microphone down and opened the box to reveal a perfectly cute ring that just screamed Amy all over.

Amy was silent for a second, looking down at the box and then back to Reagan before slowly nodding her head and stepping forward.

"Is that a yes?" Reagan smiled brightly at her.

"You know it's a yes you jackass!" Amy pulled Reagan up and kissed her hard while she let Reagan slip the ring onto her finger. "I love you to" The couple were soon surrounded by a swarm of congratulations and hugs.

It was well into the night when Karma finally got Amy alone, away from everyone.

"You don't want this…do you?" Amy went stiff before coughing to cover it up…which was a poor effort because this is Karma they are talking about, the girl who knows you better then yourself. "You hesitated before answering her, Your face during her speech was emotionless and it was heart breaking" Amy sighed and sat up on the bench.

"I love her Karma, I can't even begin to tell you how much I love her and need her and want her in my life, I love her enough to say yes and ignore how much I hate the idea of marriage because I know this is it for us, I won't love anyone as much as Reagan, I won't want anyone else but Reagan, I can't even sleep when she not in bed, I don't feel safe unless she's in the same room as me" Amy sighed and pulled her legs to her chest. " I don't need a ring or a bit of stupid paper to say I love her, but if she wants this, then I'll give it to her, the only thing I can give without drama and complications" Amy whispered the last bit and shook her head. "Besides Mrs Reagan and Amy Saltanovski sounds pretty amazing if I'm being honest"

"Amy you can't just go through with it if it's not what you truly want, you need to talk to Reagan" Karma went to move and leave.

"Karma, you don't really get a say in this, I love Reagan nothing will change that, and if she wants a wedding and a honeymoon, the whole nine yards then I will give her exactly that, because she is worth it, worth my discomfort, worth ignoring ever bad example of a marriage I've seen" Amy stood up and was in front of Karma quickly. "I'm getting Married Karma and that's it, and if you dare try and say anything to Reagan then I will hold true on my word and cut you out, completely" and with that Amy left the room, only to be pulled back by Karma.

"What has got you so convinced this is it; The Amy I know would only give up on something she feels so strongly about if something major was wrong!" Amy shook her head as a few tears escaped her eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

"I don't think I can do this anymore Rea, It's getting harder and harder to cover up" Reagan crawled into bed with Amy and carefully pulled her, to her chest and kissed her forehead.

"I know Shrimps, but I think it's time you tell them, they need to spend time with you, before it's to late" Amy looked up to see tears had made their way down her cheeks.

"Hey, you promised you wouldn't cry punk, don't you go back on our deal" Reagan laughed a little and wiped her tears away.

"I love you, you know that right?" Amy rolled over, careful not to knock anything on the bed.

"I know, and I love you so much, and I wish we could have so much more time together, I wish we could go on all our adventures we planned when we were younger, I'm so sorry Rea, I'm so sorry I'm leaving" Amy was crying harder then she had since she got the news, it was all finally catching up to her all her emotions.

"You aren't leaving Ames, you're just going on a new adventure, one I'll join when I'm a bit more older…and more mature, lets face it I'm a child up here" Reagan pointed to her head and laughed. "I'm going to go on all those adventure's for us, I'll take so many photos and visit all those lame historical places you wanted, I'll even let them take a photo's of me at all the lame tourist spots you would make me stop at" Reagan was crying as she tightened her arms around Amy. "I wish I knew you sooner, I wish you weren't leaving me so soon"

"Hey it's going to be okay, we'll be fine, you'll be okay" Reagan could hear Amy's voice starting to fade as the morphine took her to sleep. Reagan pulled her phone from her bedside and dialled the one number she refused to use.

"Hello?"

"Hey Karma…do you think you could come over?"

"Why! Has something happen?" Reagan shook her head and hung the phone up and put it on silent knowing Karma would try calling again.

"I hope you understand why Shrimps, I love you so much"


	3. Chapter 3

"What the hell Reagan!" Reagan quickly shushed Karma and pointed to the lounge.

"I…Amy she, she needs you but she doesn't want to be a burden, I can't do this on my own anymore Karma, I love her so much" Reagan was crying so hard that she didn't even notice Karma wrapping her in a tight hug till she felt her own arms tighten around Karma.

"What is going on Reagan, What is wrong?"

"She has cancer Karma, she has for the last 4 years and she stopped treatment the beginning of the year and she doesn't have long left" Karma was up and down the hall, leaving Reagan on the lounge not even bothering to chase after her.

Karma turned into the bedroom and the sight she saw was one she would never forget.

Amy lay sleeping on the bed, plugged into a few machines and looking pale and tired.

"Oh Ames" Karma quickly ditched her jacket and shoes and climbed into bed next to Amy, brushing a few strands of hair away from her face. "Why did you shut me out buttface" Amy stirred and looked up in confusion and then panic.

"Karms?" Karma nodded and Amy relaxed. "I thought it was another dream" Amy nuzzled closer to Karma. " I'm not going to be at the baby shower Karms" Amy was crying and Karma couldn't hold back her tears anymore.

"Why would you do this to me Amy, you weren't supposed to leave me, I'll be so alone without you" Karma cried harder "Please don't leave me, I'll do anything" Amy lifted her hand to Karma's cheek and wiped the tears away.

"I love you Karms, you won't be alone I'll always be around, you know how these cheesy sayings go, I'm always here, we're soulmates remember" Karma nodded.

"Is this what you meant at your party, drama and complicated stuff, because if it is, I'm going to personally murder you" Amy nodded and held Karma tighter.

"I've been thinking about going off treatment since I first went through treatment, and on my birthday I finally decided it was time, I can't live with this anymore Karms, I can't hold Rea back anymore" Karma shook her head.

"You weren't holding her back Ames, you were keeping her together, and now you're breaking her into a million pieces and not returning to fix it" Karma took a deep breathe and looked at Amy again. "have you told Farrah and Lauren?" Amy shook her head and Karma groaned.

"You're being selfish! You've taken time away from all of us! You've dumped so much on Reagan she'll be lucky to come out of this with any kind of hope, and then you're just going to leave!" Karma was yelling at Amy now as tears streamed down her cheeks and she got out of bed and left the room, quickly walking past Reagan.

"Karma! Where are you going"

"To get her fucking mother and sister, because she's to fucking selfish to do it" Reagan watched as Karma called a taxi and got in.


	4. Chapter 4

"You are the worst Donut" Lauren sat next to Amy and held her hand tightly. "Not only are you missing my wedding next year, you won't even be around to complain to about game of thrones with" Lauren didn't even bother to wipe away the tears that had fallen from her eyes without permission. "I'm not going to be okay Ames" Lauren whispered as she felt Amy squeeze her hand.

Lauren was warned when she got to the house that Amy was in and out of conscious but she could still hear.

"I know we got off on the wrong spot all those years ago, but I'm so happy and glad we figured things out, I didn't want to be alone anymore and you were there whenever I needed you, you drove 3 hours just because I had a nightmare and needed you, I'm going to miss you so much" Lauren was crying and holding Amy's hand tightly.

"You were worth the drive Ballet Bun" Amy whispered out in a rough voice. "And I did find that really nice diner on the way home" Lauren laughed and kissed the back of Amy's hand.

"I love you to Lauren, you are the best sister ever" Lauren watched as Amy drifted back into sleep quietly.

"You will always be the better sister Ames, you're heart is to big not to be the better sister" Lauren leaned over and kissed Amy's cheek and left the room quickly and ran into the Arms of Reagan who held her tightly.

"I know you did it for her, but I can't forgive you for this Reagan, you took time with my sister away, time I could have spent making memories" Reagan nodded.

"I know, I can't forgive myself, she done as much as possible to be at as many events at the start and took as many photos as she could…I didn't want to keep it a secret, I begged Amy to let me bring you all in but she refused it, I'm so sorry Lauren" Reagan was crying and collapsed back on the chair.


	5. Chapter 5

FLASHBACK

"Are you sure this isn't to fast Ames…I mean you got engaged like a week or two ago" Karma was fixing Amy's hair and make-up while Lauren went and got the gown.

"Why wait Karma, we found a perfect spot and were able to book it cheap, and everyone is on holidays so they could all come" Karma nodded and finished what she was doing.

"You look beautiful Ames" Amy nodded and turned away from the mirror to Karma.

"So do you, have I ever told you that Liam is one lucky man, Karms…I…" Amy stopped for a second and took a deep breathe. "You know I love you to the moon and back right?" Karma nodded, not truly understanding where this was going. "And if I wasn't here he would be the only person I could ever trust with your heart…I, I want you to be happy with him Karms…I need to know, is he your forever?" Karma was slightly confused but nodded slowly.

"He really is Amy, his everything to me, his my Reagan" Amy had to fight back the tears that threaten to fall, she knew her Karma would be okay, she would get through this when the time came.

NOW

"She tried to tell me once" Karma whispered as she curled herself around Liam.

"I know" Karma looked put from his chest. "She told me when I went to see her Karma, she told me so much I…I don't think I'm ready for her to go" Liam quickly got out of bed and pulled his jacket on and grabbed his keys.

Karma knew he was going to Amy and that if she followed she would take away this moment for Liam, he needed to be with Amy by himself, he needed to talk to the girl who taught him how to get through his complicated life and family"


	6. Chapter 6

Karma went to the apartment the next day to find Liam curled up in the chair holding Amy's hand, Reagan was wrapped around Amy and Amy god love her was asleep with the happiest smile on her face and Karma couldn't help but pull her phone out and capture this one happy moment.

When Karma sat on the bed Amy's eyes open and she looked at Karma and with her free hand held hers.

"Karma, can you do something for me" Karma nodded quickly. "In the bottom of the closest there's a small black box with a lock on it, can you please get it" Karma quickly got it and sat back down and watched Amy pull a small key from a chain around her neck. "Are you really going to watch me and not help?" Karma smiled and helped take the chain and key off and watched as Amy unlocked the box.

"I want you to take this box to your car now, and look in it when you get home later, you're the only one I can trust with this Karma, I'll wait till you get back up stairs" Karma quickly ran down to her car and put the box in the boot and the chain around her neck, once back inside she sat down and took Amy's hand.

"I love you Karma, and I love Reagan and Liam, I love Mum for all her advice and just being the best mum, I love Lauren because she challenges me to be better, she was an amazing Sister…but I love you so much Karma, you were there for me, you are my very best friend Karma, you are my soulmate" Karma was crying now and Amy's eye's shut.

"I love you to Amy Raudenfeld" When the words left her mouth the machines around them started to beat loudly and Reagan and Liam were awake in a second.

"No! No! No!" Reagan shouted as she rolled Amy onto her back and began CPR. "Call the fucking hospital you sag of socks!" Liam fumbled with his phone and Karma watched from the floor as she cried harder.


	7. Chapter 7

"Hey Karma, can we stop by yours?" Reagan had become one of Karma's closest friends since Amy's funeral 6 years ago.

"Yeah Rea, As long as you are bringing my favourite little monster with you" Reagan laughed and picked Kyle up from his high chair.

"How could I not bring him with me, my little man comes every where" Reagan smiled and kissed the head of her little miracle.

"I'll see you in a few then" Reagan hung the phone up and quickly got down to the car and drove to Karma's, it really was only a few minutes away.

"So what can I do for you Rea?" Karma lifted Kyle out of her arms and held him close. "Can't believe his nearly two" Reagan nodded and sat on the lounge with a little nervous smile on her face. "Spit it out Reagan before you make me to frustrated to help you"

"I think I'm falling for someone but I can't let go of Ames" Reagan looked down to her shoes and Karma sat next to her.

"Tell me about her"

"She's so beautiful Karms, and she makes me laugh so much and she just gets me, she's really cool with Kyle and I told her about Amy and she was so understanding and said she never wants to make me feel like I should forget Ames but she really wants to be with me and I really like her Karms"

Karma smiled and stood up, handing Kyle back to Reagan and walking upstairs leaving a speechless Reagan behind.

When Karma came back she held a letter and Reagan shook her head.

"She really planned these stupid letters out, for every moment when I need her" Karma smiled and picked Kyle up again and handed her the letter.

"She was a bit of a shit about them, I have so many I have to keep track off and hand out at the right moments" Reagan raised and eyebrow in question. "She wrote about 30 letters each for about 8 people with certain things on the front and I have about 4 for this little monster" Reagan smiled and looked down at the letter before quickly opening it.

My Beautiful Rea,

If Karma has given you this letter then I know you've found your love again, I was hoping you wouldn't lose it because of me.

But this is good, you deserve to be so happy, to have someone love you as much as I did and to torture you till you have no choice but to love her so insanely.

Be happy Reagan, love like there is no tomorrow and don't forget to keep going, make crazy memories and love till you feel hopeless.

Just promise me that if we have a child that they love her as their mother but please don't let them forget about me.

I love you so much Reagan, and thankyou for loving me so much and looking after me, but it's time you moved on and loved someone who can give you what I can't right now, a future and adventures.

Your Amy.

Reagan held the letter tightly and tears streamed down her cheeks.

"I love her so much, how can she just expect me to let go like this"

"Because she knew you wouldn't without a little push, which is what I'm about to do as well, if you don't call that girl and demand a date tonight I'm totally cutting you off for shane's party" Reagan laughed and pulled her phone out. "And I'll look after this little guy"


	8. Chapter 8

"Aunty KarKar" Kyle ran into the kitchen and held tightly to Karma's leg. "Where's Mama and Mummy?" Karma smiled and picked Kyle up to place him on the bench.

"That my little man is a good question, Mama said she might be out for another night…that means you are stuck with me and my lame movies" Kyle giggled and swung his legs.

"You have the best movies Aunty KarKar" Kyle watched as Karma moved about the kitchen make a pasta for dinner. "I miss my other mummy, but I don't know why" Karma stopped and turned back to Kyle with a sad smile.

"And it's okay to miss her, even if you didn't get the chance to meet her, she would have been so proud and in love with you" Kyle nodded and looked down at his shoes before looking back at Karma.

"Why do you tell me about her so much, Mama talks about her to but not as much as you" Karma smiled and quickly turned back to dinner and put everything to a low temperature.

"When your other mummy was sick and she knew she didn't have long left she wrote lots of letters, she wrote them for your Mama, Uncle Shane, Uncle Liam, Aunty Lo, Nana Far, Grandpa Bruce, and myself, but in my letters she asked that when you were born that I wouldn't let you go not knowing who your real mother is and how much she loved you, so I tell you about all our adventures and stories, about growing up and learning how to do things, for your Mama it's a little harder, she really loves your other mummy, but she also loves your now mummy just as much so sometimes she just can't tell you lots of stories because it makes her miss her so much" Kyle nodded and looked confused for a moment at Karma.

"Did you love her to, do you get really sad when you tell me stories?" Karma was fighting back a few stray tears wanting to fall.

"I love Amy so much Kyle, we were best friends since we were five and grew up as close as siblings, I get sad a lot when I think about her but I can't let that stop me from telling you about this amazing women who touched each of our lives, and when you are a bit older she has a letter for you as well"

Kyle was amazed at all the stories Karma was telling him, dinner was forgotten and pizza was ordered as they sat on the lounge watching movies and talking about Karma's childhood with Amy.


End file.
